MISDIRECTION and DISTRACTION

Dear Friends:

My Buddy Gabe is a never-ending fountain of folk wisdom. This brief story highlights a fascinating characteristic of Human nature...

Only a person in TENNESSEE could think of this. From the county where drunk driving is considered a sport, comes this true story.

Recently, a routine police patrol parked outside a bar in Paris, Tennessee. After last call the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity in which he tried his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his car and fall into it. He sat there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off.

Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off--it was a fine,dry summer night--, flicked the blinkers on and off a couple of times,honked the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more of the other patrons' vehicles left.

At last, when his was the only car left in the parking lot, he pulled out and drove slowly down the road. The police officer, having waited patiently all this time, now started up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over and administered a breathalyzer test. To his amazement, the man passed. Dumbfounded, the officer said, 'I'll have to ask you to accompany me to thepolice station. This breathalyzer equipment must be broken.' 'I doubt it,' said the truly proud Hillbilly. 'Tonight, I'm the designated decoy.'
####

Misdirection and Distraction. Two grand ploys. Use them well.

Faithfully, and in Thanksgiving,

Douglas Castle,

HUMANITAS MAXIMUS

p.s. Please visit the other blogs in this hub. You'll find them updated and full of fun.

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TRIPS WORTH TAKING

Dear Friends:

There are several places to visit and sights to see. Alright....I'll confess...there are several sites to visit and recent articles to see.

Today is 22 November, 2008: Please be absolutely certainthat you read the articles posted during these last two weeks on each of the following sites, hyperlinked below. After you have read these (and you WILL enjoy them), you will be thinking vigorously. sadly, you will still not be able to answer the question, "If knowledge is power, then how come people always say 'less is more' ?"

Before you view the batch of them, please take a peek at THE NATIONAL NETWORKER SURVEYS, and participate in the first three polls if you are involved in social and business networking. While you are there you might want to get your free subscription to THE NATIONAL NETWORKER, if you don't already have one. Thank you.

THE INTERNATIONALIST PAGE

THE GLOBAL FUTURIST

INTERNAL ENERGY PLUS

THE NATIONAL NETWORKER - RELATIONSHIP CAPITAL TOOLKIT

THE INTERNAL ENERGY PLUS FORUM

Now that you have reviewed all of these articles, rest a moment, catch your breath, and take a brief break for humor. Since I write this blog, I am allowed to be funny. You might be funny, too, but that doesn't truly matter, as you are not writing this blog.

I have never been to Australia, but the following was sent to me by my dear friend Gabe, the Founder (with a capital "F") of the Westchester-Putnam Guitar Society. Thank you, Gabe!

------------

Subject: Questions about Australia. These were posted on an Australian Tourism Website & the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a sense of humour...

Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia ? I have never>>> seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? ( UK).

A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? ( USA )

A: Depends how much you've been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks? ( Sweden )

A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia ? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane , Cairns ,Townsville and Hervey Bay ? ( UK )

A: What did your last slave die of?

Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia ? ( USA )

A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not ... oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings Cross. Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in Australia ? ( USA )

A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia ? ( UK )

A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA )

A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is ... oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.

Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia ? ( UK )

A: You are a British politician, right?

Q: Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? ( Germany )

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal.

Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense rattlesnake serum. ( USA )

A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from. All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.

Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Australia , but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. ( USA )

A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of Gum trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia ? ( USA )

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q: Can you tell me the regions in Tasmania where the female population is smaller than the male population? ( Italy )

A: Yes, gay night clubs.

Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in Australia ? ( France )

A: Only at Christmas.

Q: I was in Australia in 1969 on R+R, and I want to contact the Girl I dated while I was staying in Kings Cross*. Can you help? ( USA )

A: Yes, and you will still have to pay her by the hour.

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )

A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first.

-------

G'Day, Mates!

Faithfully,

Douglas Castle

Miasma: Grouply, Yahoo, Google, McCain, Obama, command, leadership, decsionmaking, The National Networker, Internal Energy Plus, Humanitas Maximus, The Internal Energy Plus Forum, control, public service, inspiration, survival, uniting, dividing, conquest, growth, personal growth, self-improvement, personal development, networking, Mixx, Zimbio, Digg, Technorati, Associated Press, LA Times, Fox News, Reuters, alpha, education, leadership crisis, personal power, CIOF, CHILDREN'S INTERNATIONAL OBESITY FOUNDATION, humanitarianism, The Global Futurist, The Internationalist Page, Braintenance, CIOF On Current Events, blogs, bloggers, news, news releases, Douglas castle, intelligence, cognitive enhancement, advice, help, psychology, focus, technology, seduction, manipulation, debate, education, hypnosis, NLP, RET, articles, Linked In, Microsoft, SEO, fitness, longevity, creativity, meditation, media, YouTube, organizational engineering, winning, success, telepathy, trends, predictions, commentary, blogosphere, relationships, children. obesity, independence, mind, brain, thought, entrainment, Facebook, Naymz, downloads, CDs, tapes, instruction, competition, martial arts, politics, management, widget, blidget, social networking, nanotechnology, weight-loss, humor, alternative energy, philanthropy, not-for-profit organizations, volunteering, interrogation, trade, commerce, personal dynamics, personal coaching, leadership training, mind-body connection, nootropics, longevity, social groups, business groups, marketing, ecommerce, Feedburner, RSS, newsletters, writers, co-operative advertising, leverage, survivalism, viral marketing, public relations, advertising, promotion, image-development, videos, gaming, AI, social awareness, pursuasion, theology, logic, alliances, reputation, ratings, polls, standing, positioning, self-help, metrics, design, interactivity, campaign, Wikis, chat rooms, interactive forums, mentoring, modeling, mind expansion, brainwaves, motivation, current events, press releases, keywords, adwords, economics, geopolitical economics, conflict resolution, activism, achievement, subconscious, collective mind,,,

TOUGH QUESTIONS MUST BE ASKED...AND ANSWERED.

Dear Friends:

Know thyself. To thine own self be true. The truth shall set you free. You have heard them all before. But have you examined their implications and put them into practice in your life?

The truth is the ultimate decisionmaking factor. If you do not know the truth, your planned strategy, your direction, your charted course, your most important actions may all be abysmal failures. Knowing the truth about your environment and the territory which surrounds you is important...you can't build a rocket without a knowledge of physics, and you can't repair a damaged organ without a knowledge of physiology.

Yet, despite this, we tend to avoid addressing the issues that would reveal to us, ourselves, who we really are and what we really desire. Perhaps this stems from the conditioned fear (born of the social and ethical standards of those "good" people around us who have taught and have otherwise influenced us) that we might not conform to the "norm" (whatever that might be). But then, to hide from yourself will never permit you to be truly happy and truly fulfilled.

We only learn about who we are when we ask ourselves very tough questions, and think about the "unthinkable". It is only then when we walk the terrain of the universe within us that longs to be discovered. The most critical core of our being which is smothered and suppressed in a corner of our consciousness. How do you plot a course for your happiness when you refuse to discover what will truly make you happy?

Tough questions are the ultimate means of self-discovery, and to finding your way to the self-knowledge needed to initiate your spirit's freedom.

Consider this: Would you kill in order to save the life of someone you loved? Would you sacrifice your life in order to save the life of someone you loved? When is violence justified, if ever? When is self-sacrifice justified, if ever? You must be able to answer these questions in order to learn who you truly are -- self knowledge is the key to the discovery of your deepest, truest and most compelling desires. How can you set goals if you don't truly know what you desire?

Don't be afraid of the truth. Facing the truth can only make you stronger. Start today.

Faithfully,

Douglas Castle


Miasma: Grouply, Yahoo, Google, McCain, Obama, command, leadership, decsionmaking, The National Networker, Internal Energy Plus, Humanitas Maximus, The Internal Energy Plus Forum, control, public service, inspiration, survival, uniting, dividing, conquest, growth, personal growth, self-improvement, personal development, networking, Mixx, Zimbio, Digg, Technorati, Associated Press, LA Times, Fox News, Reuters, alpha, education, leadership crisis, personal power, CIOF, CHILDREN'S INTERNATIONAL OBESITY FOUNDATION, humanitarianism, The Global Futurist, The Internationalist Page, Braintenance, CIOF On Current Events, blogs, bloggers, news, news releases, Douglas castle, intelligence, cognitive enhancement, advice, help, psychology, focus, technology, seduction, manipulation, debate, education, hypnosis, NLP, RET, articles, Linked In, Microsoft, SEO, fitness, longevity, creativity, meditation, media, YouTube, organizational engineering, winning, success, telepathy, trends, predictions, commentary, blogosphere, relationships, children. obesity, independence, mind, brain, thought, entrainment, Facebook, Naymz, downloads, CDs, tapes, instruction, competition, martial arts, politics, management, widget, blidget, social networking, nanotechnology, weight-loss, humor, alternative energy, philanthropy, not-for-profit organizations, volunteering, interrogation, trade, commerce, personal dynamics, personal coaching, leadership training, mind-body connection, nootropics, longevity, social groups, business groups, marketing, ecommerce, Feedburner, RSS, newsletters, writers, co-operative advertising, leverage, survivalism, viral marketing, public relations, advertising, promotion, image-development, videos, gaming, AI, social awareness, pursuasion, theology, logic, alliances, reputation, ratings, polls, standing, positioning, self-help, metrics, design, interactivity, campaign, Wikis, chat rooms, interactive forums, mentoring, modeling, mind expansion, brainwaves, motivation, current events, press releases, keywords, adwords, economics, geopolitical economics, conflict resolution, activism, achievement, subconscious, collective mind,,,

DEMOCRACY REQUIRES HARD WORK.

Dear Friends:

Both the insular United States and the entire world is in the throes of a major economic and psychic depression. Many will suffer. Many will complain. A few, like author Pat Kennedy, my guest author on http://theglobalfuturist.blogspot.com/, will analyze our problems, and, without wasting time shaming and blaming, will think through these problems and propose solutions. We need this type of thinking to remain a free, prosperous, peaceful people. Please read Pat's guest column at THE GLOBAL FUTURIST.

Then, go to THE NATIONAL NETWORKER - RELATIONSHIP CAPITAL TOOKIT, to see how you stack up. Your ingrained value systems are the underlying influences toward the actions you will or will not take. Relationship capital starts with certain core values at its premise.

Do you whine or do you work? Do you criticize or produce? Do you form alliances or alienate all of those whose views differ from yours? What are you doing to justify your occupancy in this world?

Faithfully,

Douglas Castle

p.s. Why commiserate when you can plan instead?

Miasma: Grouply, Yahoo, Google, McCain, Obama, command, leadership, decsionmaking, The National Networker, Internal Energy Plus, Humanitas Maximus, The Internal Energy Plus Forum, control, public service, inspiration, survival, uniting, dividing, conquest, growth, personal growth, self-improvement, personal development, networking, Mixx, Zimbio, Digg, Technorati, Associated Press, LA Times, Fox News, Reuters, alpha, education, leadership crisis, personal power, CIOF, CHILDREN'S INTERNATIONAL OBESITY FOUNDATION, humanitarianism, The Global Futurist, The Internationalist Page, Braintenance, CIOF On Current Events, blogs, bloggers, news, news releases, Douglas castle, intelligence, cognitive enhancement, advice, help, psychology, focus, technology, seduction, manipulation, debate, education, hypnosis, NLP, RET, articles, Linked In, Microsoft, SEO, fitness, longevity, creativity, meditation, media, YouTube, organizational engineering, winning, success, telepathy, trends, predictions, commentary, blogosphere, relationships, children. obesity, independence, mind, brain, thought, entrainment, Facebook, Naymz, downloads, CDs, tapes, instruction, competition, martial arts, politics, management, widget, blidget, social networking, nanotechnology, weight-loss, humor, alternative energy, philanthropy, not-for-profit organizations, volunteering, interrogation, trade, commerce, personal dynamics, personal coaching, leadership training, mind-body connection, nootropics, longevity, social groups, business groups, marketing, ecommerce, Feedburner, RSS, newsletters, writers, co-operative advertising, leverage, survivalism, viral marketing, public relations, advertising, promotion, image-development, videos, gaming, AI, social awareness, pursuasion, theology, logic, alliances, reputation, ratings, polls, standing, positioning, self-help, metrics, design, interactivity, campaign, Wikis, chat rooms, interactive forums, mentoring, modeling, mind expansion, brainwaves, motivation, current events, press releases, keywords, adwords, economics, geopolitical economics, conflict resolution, activism, achievement, subconscious, collective mind,,,

NOW ANYONE CAN GET RICH! (EVEN YOU!)

Dear Friends (and Ed):

Greetings one and all! It's time for a diversion. It might be a pleasant change of pace from listening to the financial and investment pundits deny an obvious economic depression by calling it other things (can you say "euphemism"?), including "adjustment", "profit-taking", "credit crunch", et cetera. [This is not unlike calling an elephant turd an eclair]. Ah...but I digress...

Let me take a moment to speak about INTERNAL ENERGY PLUS, just for the purpose of this diversion (and also because of the vast sum of money they promised me if I blogged them).

In INTERNAL ENERGY PLUS, we achieve goals by plotting a linear path and proceeding in increments. We do this because it is logical, and because it does not violate the laws of physics, physiology or human psychology. Ultimately, that is precisely why our approach works. Each of our training/ learning modalities is a logical tool. It is very simple. Visit http://theinternalenergyplusforum.blogspot.com/ to learn more.

Having said this, I wanted you to take a glance at some of the "alternatives" which are being offered by the tankerful every single day. Most of these advertisers (ironically) are struggling to earn even a modest income with the junk that they are raving about. Please look at some of these and smile -- even the wording is enough to turn a literate, reasonably intelligent person away. Here they are (cue drumroll):

Get out the vomit bags...

Messages In This Digest (25 Messages), Each One More Idiotic Than the Previous One!

1.1.
UNSELFISH WEALTH From: Advertising
1.2.
UNSELFISH WEALTH From: Advertise
2a.
Put Your Business in The Spotlight FREE! From: Advertising
2b.
Put Your Business in The Spotlight FREE! From: Advertising
3.1.
Would you like to make a six figure income from home? From: Advertising
4.1.
Safelistology - The Dark Science of Safelist Marketing From: lay
5a.
EARN $200+ PER DAY TAKING SIMPLE PHOTOS IN YOUR LOCAL AREA! From: denzel
6.1.
Make $1500 Per Day Doing Nothing! From: Leo
7.1.
Earn Up To $423 A Day Taking Online Surveys! From: milyoner
8.1.
Earn up tp $860+/week to start From: Alan
9.1.
Blast Your Ad To Over 3,000,000 Websites Daily! From: asuman
10.1.
Email 81 Million Targeted Prospects Monthly! From: Sam
11.1.
Web Traffic Has Never Been Easier! From: fiona
12a.
Make thousands of dollars in Google Cash monthly! From: Linda
13.1.
BLAST YOUR AD TO 5,000 groups for only $5.95 or less! From: Poster
14.1.
Click to Get Paid For What You Think! From: asuman
15.1.
100,000 Real Visitors Waiting! From: Tom
16.
We want to invest $30,000 in your Solid Future Income (SFI) Business From: advertisingandspotlighting@yahoogroups.co
17.
How to avoid home business failure!, 11/1/2008, 12:00 pm From: advertisingandspotlighting@yahoogroups.co
18.1.
E-Mail to 96 Million Targeted Recipients Per Month! From: Korum
19a.
Recipe, Advertising & TV Groups From: Dorie
20a.
Candle Lover's Dream Business. From: advertise1051@advertiseonline4u.com
21.
Forget everything that your Uplines have told you. From: Advertising
22.1.
One size does not fit all!! From: Advertise
23.1.
ONLINE MONEY MACHINE! No Selling or From: Advertise

####

My personal favorites are always the ones which make claims along these lines:

"This ----- can't stop making you money, even if you want it to!"

"Make a fortune WHILE YOU SLEEP!"

"I make thousands every week, working from my kitchen table in my underwear!"

"Stupid and broke? This system works for ANYONE!"

"When I first heard about this quintuple multiplicative guaranteed sixfold matrix MLM program, I said, 'Nah, that's impossible.' That was until my friend showed me the gleaming new Rolls Royce in his driveway."

"Don't read this unless you are prepared to be RICH!"

"Dark, covert, underground secret hypnotic technique makes everyone do your bidding!!!"

####

I hope that you enjoyed the show. Now run down to your local bank branch (since they are flush with low-cost cash since the "bailout"), and ask for a debt consolidation loan. We all need exercise.

All the best.

Faithfully,

Douglas Castle
DOUGLAS CASTLE at http://www.linkedIn.com/in/douglascastle
THE GLOBAL FUTURIST
THE NATIONAL NETWORKER
HUMANITAS MAXIMUS
INTERNAL ENERGY PLUS

Miasma: Grouply, Yahoo, Google, McCain, Obama, command, leadership, decisionmaking, The National Networker, Internal Energy Plus, Humanitas Maximus, The Internal Energy Plus Forum, control, public service, inspiration, survival, uniting, dividing, conquest, growth, personal growth, self-improvement, personal development, networking, Mixx, Zimbio, Digg, Technorati, Associated Press, LA Times, Fox News, Reuters, alpha, education, leadership crisis, personal power, CIOF, CHILDREN'S INTERNATIONAL OBESITY FOUNDATION, humanitarianism, The Global Futurist, The Internationalist Page, Braintenance, CIOF On Current Events, blogs, bloggers, news, news releases, Douglas castle, intelligence, cognitive enhancement, advice, help, psychology, focus, technology, seduction, manipulation, debate, education, hypnosis, NLP, RET, articles, Linked In, Microsoft, SEO, fitness, longevity, creativity, meditation, media, YouTube, organizational engineering, winning, success, telepathy, trends, predictions, commentary, blogosphere, relationships, children. obesity, independence, mind, brain, thought, entrainment, Facebook, Naymz, downloads, CDs, tapes, instruction, competition, martial arts, politics, management, widget, blidget, social networking, nanotechnology, weight-loss, humor, alternative energy, philanthropy, not-for-profit organizations, volunteering, interrogation, trade, commerce, personal dynamics, personal coaching, leadership training, mind-body connection, nootropics, longevity, social groups, business groups, marketing, ecommerce, Feedburner, RSS, newsletters, writers, co-operative advertising, leverage, survivalism, viral marketing, public relations, advertising, promotion, image-development, videos, gaming, AI, social awareness, pursuasion, theology, logic, alliances, reputation, ratings, polls, standing, positioning, self-help, metrics, design, interactivity, campaign, Wikis, chat rooms, interactive forums, mentoring, modeling, mind expansion, brainwaves, motivation, current events, press releases, keywords, adwords, economics, geopolitical economics, conflict resolution, activism, achievement, subconscious, collective mind,,,